The Heart Knows

July 2002

OMG – I had no idea where the decision to leave IBM and set up on my own was leading me. I thought it was all about my career. Wrong!

So much has happened. Just after I left IBM in 2000, my Dad passed away. I couldn’t even think about setting up my business yet, even though the pressure was on me. Maui came into my mind. I said to my partner, ‘Graham, I have to go, its calling me.’ ‘Well, I can’t get time off work, and I don’t want you to go without me,’ he answered. It was so strong a feeling, I knew I was going. So, I rang Graham’s boss and a few weeks later, we were there. From the moment the captain announced ‘Ladies and gentleman, the Islands are in sight,’ I knew I was coming home. I would discover just how deep a home it was, as the Island of Mu.

I arrived back completely replenished and I knew a healing had taken place. I had learnt much since my mother’s passing, and I could feel both Mum and Dad were with me. Willing me on.

Within a few weeks, I had secured my first contract with Xerox. They had just acquired a small printer company and I was asked by the director of this company to help them develop some new sales partners. My remit was just to work with this side of the business – not big Xerox.

Well … from the first few days of being in the company, I knew that was not the answer. It was like asking me to go for bronze, when platinum was staring me in the face, but it would need a bridge building: a unifying of two businesses, to help them see what they could achieve together.

My heart knew and it confirmed it by the enthusiasm I felt and the vision I could see. It exhilarated me, and this inspired others to support me. From that point on, synchronicity stepped in and it came together like a jigsaw. Big Xerox assigned someone to work with me and I felt like I had known him forever. What we achieved was even bigger than I had imagined. It created millions of pounds of revenue for them, but for me, it was all about Unity.

I worked with Xerox throughout most of 2001, and as I stepped into 2002, my spiritual path opened up massively. I swear to God, there wasn’t enough lifetime for the amount of books I bought! Hundreds of them. Yes, it had all been such a high the past year, and then out of the blue …

That fateful email arrived, with a newsletter attached. Chopra Centre were doing a Seduction of Spirit seminar in California. I have to be honest, I was usually so busy, I didn’t pay attention to the newsletters, but this time it was like it had flashing lights and fog horns blasting! My eyes went straight to it and I knew: I was going!

Graham wasn’t interested in the spiritual side but he loved America and wanted to come and hang around the resort. For not the first time, I thought, Oh this must all be about my career and what I am going to do next. Very wrong!

By day two, I was so deep in meditation and had such clarity, it AMAZED me. To a point where it then shocked me, because I heard so clearly: It’s time to leave Graham. Just like I had heard the words when it was time to leave IBM. As if they were coded instructions, I had written in my soul contract.

That whole five days of the seminar was about me opening up, going into places I had shut down. For once it wasn’t about my work, it was about me, the Woman. I sobbed my heart out because I knew what was going to happen and I had no idea if I had the courage to see it through … to set us both free, because if it was right for me, it was right for him …

Diary of...

A journey To freedom

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